Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
