ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
23 Absolutely Despicable Things That People Have Actually Done
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
25 Disturbing Facts That Will Make You Question Everything
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.