i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital