Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize