im holly from the hills drunk
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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