It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Fuck me I smell like cheese
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
