no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
