and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
21 Awkward Ways People Found Out Their Partner Was Into Outrageous Sex Acts
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit