there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
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listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
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How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.