my soul wont recognize me after tonight
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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