can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize