Plan B is the new Plan A
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
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