Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
