when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
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