If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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