just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I just want nice things and good sex
We smell like vodka and hangover
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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