I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
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