But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
