One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize