I want to stick my p in your. b.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
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