Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
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