Texts From Last Night

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  (989): View more from Michigan

  Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.

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  (989): Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday. http://tfl.nu/laq5
  Replies (29) Good night (6858) Bad night (1394)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...

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  (770): He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose... http://tfl.nu/mrqu
  Replies (5) Good night (950) Bad night (4124)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...

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  (309): it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with... http://tfl.nu/q2va
  Replies (23) Good night (6279) Bad night (1292)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?

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  (404): So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat? http://tfl.nu/7wij
  Replies (12) Good night (5845) Bad night (1237)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.

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  (303): Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me. http://tfl.nu/hog8
  Replies (3) Good night (1088) Bad night (2522)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances

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  (306): But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances http://tfl.nu/e227
  Replies (4) Good night (2284) Bad night (855)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.

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  (773): Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night. http://tfl.nu/pczq
  Replies (8) Good night (2323) Bad night (1064)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.

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  (770): She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out. http://tfl.nu/r137
  Replies (11) Good night (1077) Bad night (2693)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?

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  (+61): He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday? http://tfl.nu/aaeg
  Replies (5) Good night (2059) Bad night (1302)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.

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  (+44): Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife. http://tfl.nu/3wb9
  Replies (11) Good night (900) Bad night (2442)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.

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  (423): It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling. http://tfl.nu/7h2p
  Replies (4) Good night (591) Bad night (1342)
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again

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  (905): I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again http://tfl.nu/ut4u
  Replies (2) Good night (582) Bad night (738)
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  (559): View more from California

  Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational

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  (559): Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational http://tfl.nu/6erv
  Replies (4) Good night (1888) Bad night (645)
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  (518): View more from New York

  That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing

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  (518): That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz (978): Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing http://tfl.nu/v9yz
  Replies (2) Good night (797) Bad night (496)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.

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  (843): A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's. http://tfl.nu/m6a2
  Replies (2) Good night (563) Bad night (400)

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