They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize