hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
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