Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
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