New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
