Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
