she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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