remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I'm sobbing to NWA
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize
