girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
