no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Randomize
