So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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