I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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