If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize