: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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