If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
