just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
