how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
