One girl and one boy is just not enough.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Less talking, more tequila
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
