I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
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