ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize