Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
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