So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
