I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
