I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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