i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize