I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
We left the knife in your bed.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
