New invention idea: vibrating tampons
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Randomize
