i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
