Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I need water and some morals
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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