dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
