So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
